This is me, and how I feel.

[Roark]

I am so used to people hating me for who I am, I know this is not the case and in this I am a where of the fact I will have to say what I feel must be said of me. After all no one ever got respect by asking for it. I am prepared defend my beliefs to the bitter end.
I have crawled my whole life while everyone spits at me, it is what feeds my apathy. I come from a world not everyone knows, especially some of you.
I appreciate the fact that you show kindness to me. I am truly grateful but I have a bad habit of making friends that turn their back on me just because of who I am, these are the reasons I say what I might say. Because I am afraid of this, I fear that if I let my guard down some one here will break me like everyone else. I hate this feeling, it kills me that I feel this hurtful.
I suppose I suffer from social atrophy. If there is anyone I really feel I can trust it would be Galadreil, Miru, and maybe Hyraxylos. Sorry if this sounds fruity, but it's true.

I have gone my entire life not being able to trust anyone other then Auroara, I know it is a sad life but that’s what I’ve come to think. You have no idea how badly I want to let that all go, but the hold is just so strong, I respect everyone here you’re the first ones I feel that I can trust, that’s what I say what I say I know my trust was poorly shown on the book topic.
And I would love nothing more then to amend for it. I apologize with all my heart.
I do hope that one day I can learn to take off the mask and rip it to shreds once in for all. In this I will no longer relate to this world of hate that is forced on my plate, each and everyday.
I’ve never been good at concealing the hand that I play when I’m trying so hard just to beat this. All I can ask is for the chance to correct my wrongs thought the answer may be right in front of me, I doubt I will ever see it. I feel that through you I may have a chance.
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The blood of that which you beleive run deep within, if you feel this then there is no need to doubt.

[Jasriella]

There is a saying, I made this myself but there are others quite similar.

A dragon chooses his friends with the utmost care for it is not our enemies that can hurt us the most but those of whom that we keep close to our heart for they are the ones that can tear our hearts asunder.

You just need to be more careful about who you let your guard down to. I don't even open up all the way to my parents. There are maybe two people I fully trust with my secrets (that I personally know) and sometimes I get scared because I don't know if they're going to abuse those secrets or not. I suppose the way I go about things isn't the best for although I can make friends quite easily, I still feel more alone than ever because I know I can't trust them the way I trust those select few.

The way you presented your book and then us finding out that it was a fake and that you wont give evidence of the real deal. I can somewhat see that you were trying to find a way to be accepted still, that you wanted people to take notice of you but that obviously backfired. I know it hurts, I've done similar things in the past, but before you start asking for forgiveness from others you have to forgive yourself and learn from the mistake.

And what does Auroara have to say about this? From what I've heard she is a very wise and old soul and I don't think she would/does approve of this.
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I am trapped between heaven and hell. My wings carry me upon the winds. Above lies heaven, below hell. Yet I must land in hell to soar in heaven. I am a Dragon!

[Raven]

Dragonwiter, I feel no enmity towards you. From what I've seen the only thing I can really disagree with is your attempt to mislead people with your book post. However, I hold any spiritualistic worldview that relies on miracles or extraplanar forces to explain their reality with suspicion. Be at ease that I feel as much disregard for the biblical evidence spouted by Christians as I do for your attempts to prove your beliefs (something that cannot be done, by the way) using debate, logic, and the "evidence" you have supplied. As far as this little birdie is concerned, the only way to earn my respect in this case is for you to believe what you believe and not try to convince me that it is reality. Or, if you are to convince me, to do so using established scientific principles and evidence I can really get my hands into.

~Raven
_________________
The Lichen grows slowly, atop of a rock.
It doesn't think, it scarcely feels,
But mightn't it be somehow greater than we?

[dfangd]

While I personally do not think that this really warranted the creation of a new topic, since this is obviously aimed at a select few individuals, I do respect the fact that you are making a stand for yourself. I do not tread all over people, hammer my own cynicism into the minds of others, or try to demand some crude respect through my actions. My wish is to voice my own opinions, just as you have voiced yours. I have no quarrel with you, I am just very critical of all that is not tangible. A long, long while ago, Darkdragon and I used to have an ongoing joke about love, and whether it was real or not. It has taken me four years to finally trust that idea, and it is a very common and widely accepted one. I do not want you to take my deathgrip on logic and reason personally... because it's not personal at all.

I shant write more for fear of making you read an incarnation of Raven's post... his thoughts are mine on the subject.
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.:. Nasroniala .:.

[DarkDragon]

As Raven said, many of us feel no animosity towards you. Also, like Raven, the contention is the deception of the book topic, and not much else.

I don't hate you. I believe that "To each their own." However, like Raven, that does no mean I will sit idle and have someone else's world view shoved down my throat. Believe what you wish, but do not attempt to convince me of it's truth, for simply my beliefs are different. And the most important part of having you beliefs respected is to respect those of other and not bludgeon them with you own. You should need no validation from us if you truly believe what you say you do.

We don't hate you and I doubt we ever will. But by the same token, we may someday simply ignore you. The choice is yours.
_________________
May you be in heaven a half hour before the devil knows you're dead.
-An Irish toast

[Rayadragon]

Dragonwriter, I read your post earlier this morning, and have been debating exactly how I wanted to respond. First I have to say, as one of the unapologetic cynics of the board, I'm kindof sad that I missed the book debate.

One thing that caught my attention is the repeated comments to the effect that people hate you because of who (or perhaps what?) you are. The way that I read this is that you're convinced that people hate you because you're otherkin, whether they know that or not. This is the main part that I'm still debating on how to answer. Just from personal experience, there's normally more to like/dislike than just that. Then again, you still sound on the "young" side (can't tell from your posts if you're in middle school, or high school. Either way I'd concider you young [which makes me feel old...]). At that age, it really can be just a simple thing that causes someone to like you or dislike you. I think the main thing to ask yourself is if you might be doing something unintentionally that could be offending people. On the flip side, it could be nothing at all, and you just have the great misfortune to be surrounded by a bunch of idiots.

As I said at the top of my post, I'm a bit sorry I missed the book posts. I used to be a much kinder, gentler person when dealing with newer members with their "super l33t awsome powers!!!" or justifications of their powers, but not so much anymore. Others have said it, it still bears some repeating though, that through the internet, the only way you have to present yourself is through your words and the information you post. If you post false boasts, false information, or photoshopped pictures, you will be found out and your future credibility will be strained. It's worse when you continue to insist past the discovery of the falsehood. Repeating the lie does not make it a truth. It just alienates you more from the people who you responded to in the first place. In essence, you're calling us stupid losers who can't tell the difference between a truth and a lie. We're not incompetents, and yet by persisting in those actions, that's exactly what you're assuming us to be. That tends not to make you many friends. In this case you've hopefully learned from your mistake (except for the changing your eyes to slits comment...).

Like Raven said, nothing you've done is unredeamable, just be cautious. Your beliefs are your own. You don't need justification for them. Just don't offer us falsehoods to try to justify those beliefs. If you offer proof, and you hand us lies, you're just hurting yourself in the end.
_________________
"People who are easily offended need to be offended more often."
"Do on to others as you would have others do on to you."

[Namhias]

I'm not angry, nor do I hate you, or dislike you. I won't repeat what others have said before me here, I agree with them.
I get the impression that you try really hard to fit in, be part of the whole, and not feel like an outcast. You're not an outcast, and you are part of this forum. You don't have to provide any "evidence" of being an otherkin, there is none. Not real, tangible evidence anyway. There is the possibility we're all mistaken and that we (the few otherkin in the world) all have the same kind of delusion. I digress...

Some things should be kept to yourself, especially if it's anything that effects real life, and you have absolutely no evidence of it.
Being someone here who voices his opinion, supports his / her posts with logic, good insight or generally something helpful, will give you respect. Lying about something has the opposite effect. People have a (sometimes annoying) habit of remembering the negative stuff better than all the good stuff.

Just be yourself, be kind, be honest and don't lie or make up things to fit in better, and you should be alright.

[albvan]

Just like Rayadragon, I missed the book debate too, though I can recall similar situations from past times. There was one member which posted photos of dragons, which were of course made in Photoshop. And latter made an apology just like you did, and we forgived her. She also did some other things, worse things , but that should not concern you since you're nowhere near that.

I feel no anymosity toward you, dragonwriterX. Though I may not agree with some of your beliefs, there's no reason for us not to be friends, or at least coexist peacifully. We are a heteregenous lot ourselves (do you recall some of our debates, Raven?). So, if we really hated somebody for his beliefs, this forum would fall apart very soon.
I'm sorry I excluded you from the "we" in the above sentence. You will be part of "we" for me from this post on.